A week in Ramadan 2024 (1445 AH)


Today marks the 18th day of Ramadan, and as is customary each year, this month spirals into a whirlwind of activity. It’s a period filled with exhausting early morning wake-ups for suhoor, the usual daily routines compounded by the effects of reduced food and sleep. Yet amidst the hustle and bustle, with numerous other engagements unfolding, time seems to slip away faster, contributing to the weariness. However, despite the fatigue, the experience is undeniably rewarding and enriching. I wouldn’t alter any part of it. Alongside reconnecting with our children and grandchildren—entailing frequent travels along the M6/M40/M1 & M25—I’ve had the pleasure of attending various events. While not all directly linked to Ramadan, they bear relevance to its essence in some form or another.

Last week, I had the pleasure of supporting and attending an event in Parliament organised by the Sir David Amiss UK Children’s Parliament, in collaboration with the Association of British Muslims and Football for Peace. Children from Muslim, Jewish, and Christian backgrounds united to dismantle a symbolic “Wall of Division” for water security, sending a powerful message that despite our cultural and religious differences, we can and must collaborate on issues of global significance. This event shed light on the urgent matter of water security affecting communities worldwide.

I was particularly impressed by the work of The Sir David Amess UK Children’s Parliament, which aims to empower young voices and cultivate an understanding of fairness and democracy. Through partnerships with organisations like Football for Peace and the Association of British Muslims, they provide a platform for children to engage in meaningful dialogue and take action on issues shaping their futures.

On Saturday, I had the privilege of attending a bar mitzvah at The Ark Synagogue in Northwood. For those unfamiliar, a bar mitzvah (meaning “son of the commandment” in Aramaic) or bat mitzvah for a girl, is a significant ceremony in Jewish tradition that signifies the transition of Jewish children from childhood to adulthood. According to Jewish law, this milestone typically occurs when a Jewish boy or girl turns thirteen years old. During the ceremony I attended, the young boy was called to the Torah (the Jewish sacred text) to read a portion of the weekly Torah portion in Hebrew, demonstrating his commitment to observing Jewish laws and traditions as an adult member of the community.

Meeting and conversing with Rabbi Aaron Goldstein and numerous members of the congregation brought me great joy. It was my inaugural experience attending a bar mitzvah, and I was thoroughly impressed by the confidence shown by the young person as he spoke and eloquently explained the Hebrew text he was about to read. His clarity was immensely helpful to many of us present. Especially moving were the prayers offered by Rabbi Goldstein for the safety and security of both Israelis and Palestinians.


The day concluded with a delightful iftar shared with my eldest son’s in-laws. Ramadan always presents a delightful chance to reconnect with family and friends we may not have seen for some time. It’s a period for spiritual contemplation and self-discipline, offering us the opportunity to deepen our gratitude for the everyday blessings we often overlook, such as food and clean water. Additionally, Ramadan nurtures empathy and compassion for those less fortunate, especially in our world marred by conflict. It serves as a unifying force, bringing families and friends closer together, fostering stronger bonds, and promoting a sense of togetherness and unity.



On Tuesday, I received an invitation to join an iftar gathering at the home of a Jewish friend. It was a heartwarming scene as Jewish, Muslim, and Christian sisters convened just before Maghrib to share in breaking our fast together. We engaged in prayer, gathered around the table, and dined together. Amidst discussions about the distressing situation in Gaza and the events of October 7th, including the hostages, one sentiment remained steadfast: the importance of preserving relationships between British Muslims and British Jews. Interestingly, many of us harboured similar concerns about attending—not questioning the decision to join, but rather how our respective faith or community members might react knowing we were “breaking bread” with those of other faiths. However, what became evident was our collective understanding that, as women, we approach things differently, and therein lies great strength. The following prayer was read before we ate and I shall end with these very powerful words, written by Kamran Shazad from the Bahu trust in Birmingham:

Oh God, You are the Creator, the
All-Powerful, the Sustainer of all life

Oh God, we are gathered here today with our
interfaith friends to show solidarity with refugees, Ya Allah, give us the
strength to show more compassion for their plight, soften our hearts to their
situation and guide us in seeking justice and mercy on their behalf.

Oh God, we pray for an end to the wars,
poverty and human rights abuses that drive desperate people to become refugees
in the first place.

Oh God, we cannot sit here in prayer and not
hold in our hearts the crisis that we are seeing in the Middle East.

Ya Allah, let
violence end in the region.

Oh God,, our hearts break for those killed
and those left behind—for the orphaned child, the injured elderly, those
abducted and families desperate for safety.

Oh God, we pray for those who have lost
loved ones.

Oh God, please protect and provide for those
who have been abducted and bring them home safely.

Oh God, let them be
reunited with their loved ones.

Oh God, we pray for the opening of
humanitarian corridors to allow food, essentials and medical supplies to reach
those in need.

Oh God, give strength to the suffering people
in the face of the escalating humanitarian crisis

Oh God,, we pray that aid workers be able to
rescue the injured, comfort the grieving and help rebuild many lives.

Oh God, we pray for peace and reconciliation
to overcome conflict.

We ask that you give wisdom and direction to
our global leaders and those in power who have the ability to impact the course
of this conflict.

Oh God, many friends have come together
today for the greater good, I beg you to shower us with your blessings of
guidance and bring us all to goodness.

Oh God,, strengthen the bonds of friendship
between us, help us to be bold advocates and to be strong agents of peace in
our own communities.

Ameen

“O humanity! Indeed, We created you from a male and a female, and made you into nations and tribes so that you may ˹get to˺ know one another. Surely the most noble of you in the sight of Allah is the most righteous among you. Allah is truly All-Knowing, All-Aware”. (Quran 49:13)

(PS. If you’ve found my blog enjoyable and informative, kindly consider supporting one of the charities I’m spotlighting through my upcoming skydiving event in July! Your contribution, no matter how small, can make a meaningful difference to peoples lives. To donate, simply click on the link provided. Thank you sincerely for your generosity in advance! https://justgiving.com/team/mumandsonmissionpossible

Christmas & Farewell to 2023

I am looking forward to seeing the back of 2023. The last few months have weighed heavily on my heart and on my soul. This is the first time in many years I haven’t sent any Christmas cards to friends or neighbours. I haven’t put up a Christmas tree, a seasonal ritual that is designed to bring a little warmth and cheer into the dark winter evenings. Because no matter how many lights we turn on, how many candles we burn, the darkness that surrounds us, isn’t one that can be eradicated by candles, fairy lights, tinsel and baubles. 

In 2014, as party of a Christian -Muslim programme, I visited the Holy Lands and one of the many places I visited was The Church of the Nativity in Bethlehem, built on the site where according to Christian tradition, it is believed Mary gave birth to Jesus. For reasons that require no explanation, Christmas this year has been cancelled in Bethlehem. A land in turmoil. A land witnessing much death, misery and destruction. The cynic in might say, well obviously no one wants to travel to an area of ongoing conflict so cancelling Christmas might be a sound business decision and one based on common sense. But I would like to believe it is more than that. I would like to believe it is because we are being reminded that Jesus too was born into a world where children were being massacred by a tyrant, where a family had to flee their home with nothing, with nowhere to go, in search of a place of safety and security.

I hope and pray that 2024 brings peace to the world and comfort to the bereaved. I pray those being held to ransom are released and world leaders find a solution that leads us out of this very dark period in world history.

Wishing you and your families peace and goodwill this Christmas. Praying for peace and for the safety of all our children.

On Children

And a woman who held a babe against her bosom said
“Speak to us of children”

Your children are not your children
They are the sons and daughters of life’s longing for itself
They come through you but not from you
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you

You may give them your love but not your thoughts
For they have their own thoughts
You may house their bodies but not their souls
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow

Which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams
You may strive to be like them
But seek not to make them like you
For life goes not backward, nor tarries with yesterday

You are the bows from which your children
As living arrows are sent forth
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite
And he bends you with his might

That his arrows may go swift and far
Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness
For even as he loves the arrow that flies
So he loves also the bow that is stable

From The Prophet By Khalil Gibran

Remembering Srebrenica

I first posted this blog following my visits to Bosnia in 2014.

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 According to the Bosnia and Herzegovina tourist board, Bosnia “is one of the last undiscovered regions of the southern Alps. Vast tracks of wild and untouched nature make it an ideal holiday destination for adventurers and nature lovers alike. The central Dinaric Alps are a hikers and walkers paradise. Enchanted by both Mediterranean and Alpine climates, the range of diverse landscapes will stun and amaze you”.

Tourist boards have a habit of inflating reality in a bid to encourage visitors to their part of the world. On this occasion I can say the description is very much understated. The country is stunning. Everywhere you turn you see mountains, trees and lush greenery – hard to comprehend how a land of such exquisite geography could have experienced such gruesome horrors only 28 years ago. In Europe. A short three hours flight from London.

But that is the reality of Bosnia. Those of us of a certain age will never forget the scenes unfolding on our TV scenes as the worst genocide since World War II unfolded before our very eyes. And we sat, helpless, unable to protect the innocent men and boys being slaughtered, the estimated 20-50,000 girls and women being raped and families being torn apart and displaced in a war that would be a reminder of how ineffective we are as a human race. A genocide that took place in a region despite it being declared a safe haven by the United Nations. Over 8372 slaughtered in the fields, farms, school buildings, and warehouses in Srebrenica. Sons torn away from their mothers arms, fathers and sons separated, boys watching their school friends being gunned down whilst trying to escape – these are images that many who survived the atrocity still see every time they close they eyes. But the hardest thing for the women to bear is the burden they carry of not knowing what really happened to their husband, son, father, brother, uncle and nephew. For many, their remains have never been found. Many remains though unearthed are still to be identified. Those that are found and reunited can finally be given a funeral by their loved ones and can be put them to rest. Many families may have only a few bones to bury, but they still fulfil what they see as their religious obligation – to have a proper Muslim funeral, and return the remains of their loved one to their Maker, with dignity.

It was a real priveledge for me to be part of a delegation to visit Bosnia twice as part of the Lessons from Srebrenica visits organised by Remembering Srebrenica in 2014. An opportunity to see and learn first hand about not just the atrocities that unfolded there, but witness the devastation that was left behind and how the Bosnians are still coming to terms with it. As someone who has worked in equality and diversity, inter-faith relations and hate crime initiatives for most of my life it is very hard to comprehend how such hate can exist in anyone to the extent they want to see the elimination of an entire race.

Lessons from Srebrenica remains a very important initiative for everyone, but particularly our youth. They need to understand what happens when hate goes unchecked – how far and how quickly things escalate. Allport’s scale (1954) demonstrates this very clearly when it outlines how this progression takes place. What might initially start as harmless fun, making jokes or derogatory comments about another group, negative stereotypes can very quickly escalate to active avoidance of them, discriminating against them in, for example, access to opportunities, goods and services, to physical attacks (hate crimes), lynchings, burning of property, to the final act of genocide and attempting to ethnic cleanse an entire group of people. Think Holocaust. Think Rwanda. Think Bosnia.

How often have we said “never again”? How many more times must it be said? Until as a human race we begin to recognise that it is human beings, just like you and me who have committed these atrocities and it will be ordinary people like you and me who will commit them again, we will continue to witness these horrific senseless acts of brutality across the world, again and again.

“All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing” (Burke)

When we say never again, let us mean it.

You can find out more about Lessons from Srebrenica at http://srebrenica.org.uk/

 

This photograph of the beautiful landscape was taken as we approached Sarajevo. Hard to believe the horrors this land has seen. This photograph of the beautiful landscape was taken as we approached Sarajevo. Hard to believe the horrors this land has seen.
Photographs by Tarik Samarah, a Bosnian photographer who compiled the project Photographs by Tarik Samarah, a Bosnian photographer who compiled the project “Srebrenica – genocide at the heart of Europe”

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The grave of Alija Izetbegović, who in 1990 became the first Chairman of the Presidency of Bosnia and Herzegovina. The grave of Alija Izetbegović, who in 1990 became the first Chairman of the Presidency of Bosnia and Herzegovina.

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The delegation at dinner with the British Ambassador to Bosnia Edward Ferguson The delegation at dinner with the British Ambassador to Bosnia Edward Ferguson

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It transpired His Excellency had lived in Pakistan for a short while and still had a favourite Urdu song! It transpired His Excellency had lived in Pakistan for a short while and still had a favourite Urdu song!
On the road to Tuzla where we visited the Podrinje Identification Project which included both the forensic facility and the forensic DNA facility) On the road to Tuzla where we visited the Podrinje Identification Project which included both the forensic facility and the forensic DNA facility)
It didn't seem to matter where we went and where we looked. There were cemeteries everywhere It didn’t seem to matter where we went and where we looked. There were cemeteries everywhere
The overwhelming smell of death was everywhere. So sad to see how remains of our fellow humans who once walked and talked like us, are now stored, until such a time they can be reunited with their loved ones. The overwhelming smell of death was everywhere. So sad to see how remains of our fellow humans who once walked and talked like us, are now stored, until such a time they can be reunited with their loved ones.
The remains of one individual going through the process of being identified. The task made even harder because, in the effort to hide their crimes, the Serbs moved bodies from mass graves and bones of one individual have been found across multiple sites. The remains of one individual going through the process of being identified. The task made even harder because, in the effort to hide their crimes, the Serbs moved bodies from mass graves and bones of one individual have been found across multiple sites.
The International Commission on Missing Persons is funded from 25 countries The International Commission on Missing Persons is funded from 25 countries

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The processes used it trying to identify remains are staggering The processes used in trying to identify the remains are staggering

 

 

Next stop Srebrenica with a tour of the Potocari Memorial and Battery Factory Next stop Srebrenica with a tour of the Potocari Memorial and Battery Factory

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Mothers of Srebrenica Mothers of Srebrenica

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The battery factory where the men and women were separated before the men were taken off to be slaughtered The battery factory where the men and women were separated before the men were taken off to be slaughtered

 

Inside the factory, a space widely recognised from the photograph showing 600 coffins of victims awaiting burial Inside the factory, a space widely recognised from the photograph showing 600 coffins of victims awaiting burial

 

At the Residence of the Grand Mufti of Bosnia At the Residence of the Grand Mufti of Bosnia

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The Church, the Synagogue and the Mosque all within a short space of each other in the old town of Sarajevo

IMG_5638This photograph of the beautiful landscape was taken on the approach into SarajevoIMG_5625

 

 

And finally an opportunity to have a look at the sights and sounds of the city before our flight back home

 

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A Sarajevo Rose is a concrete scar caused by a mortar shell's explosion that was later filled with red resin. Mortar rounds landing on concrete create a unique fragmentation pattern that looks almost floral in arrangement. Because Sarajevo was a site of intense urban warfare and suffered thousands of shell explosions during the Siege of Sarajevo, the marked concrete patterns are a unique feature to the city. Throughout the city, these spots mark where one or more deaths took place as a result of mortar attacks. A Sarajevo Rose is a concrete scar caused by a mortar shell’s explosion that was later filled with red resin. Mortar rounds landing on concrete create a unique fragmentation pattern that looks almost floral in arrangement. Because Sarajevo was a site of intense urban warfare and suffered thousands of shell explosions during the Siege of Sarajevo, the marked concrete patterns are a unique feature to the city. Throughout the city, these spots mark where one or more deaths took place as a result of mortar attacks.
“In 1914, war started in Sarajevo, Bosnia. In 1991 it started again”. This stones marks the spot where Archduke Francis Ferdinand was assassinated, triggering the start of World War 1Re